six.

If you want to feel old, watch your baby turn six. 

I started blogging while she was still growing in my belly--a way to keep mothers and sisters updated on the progress of our little bun......and here she is, six.

She had us laughing from the beginning--just a few months old and she could pull some of the funniest faces I'd ever seen. 

She never fails to entertain--whether it be singing (although don't let her know you're listening.....or she pretends to be embarrassed), or her very own dance moves. Most of her days are spent pretending she's some kind of animal--I cannot even tell you how many times I have to yell 

"NO BARKING IN THE HOUSE!"

That's a normal thing to yell at your daughter, right?

She loves every person and every creature she meets, and loves them hard. 

She is so sensitive and so tough at the same time.

Her knees are always bruised and her hair is always wild.

I feel so lucky to be her mama.

She planned her whole day. 

Sticky buns for breakfast (which were actually ready at lunch time.....)

The Zoo. 

Settebello. 

Cake.

Angel Food Cake

recipe from Alton Brown 

1 3/4 cups sugar

1/4 teaspoon salt

1 cup cake flour, sifted

12 egg whites (the closer to room temperature the better)

1/3 cup warm water

1 teaspoon orange extract, or extract of your choice

1 1/2 teaspoons cream of tartar

Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

In a food processor spin sugar about 2 minutes until it is superfine. Sift half of the sugar with the salt the cake flour, setting the remaining sugar aside.

In a large bowl, use a balloon whisk to thoroughly combine egg whites, water, orange extract, and cream of tartar. After 2 minutes, switch to a hand mixer. Slowly sift the reserved sugar, beating continuously at medium speed. Once you have achieved medium peaks, sift enough of the flour mixture in to dust the top of the foam. Using a spatula fold in gently. Continue until all of the flour mixture is incorporated.

Carefully spoon mixture into an ungreased tube pan. Bake for 35 minutes before checking for doneness with a wooden skewer. (When inserted halfway between the inner and outer wall, the skewer should come out dry).

Cool upside down on cooling rack for at least an hour before removing from pan.

Homemade Whip Cream

2 cups whipping cream

1/2 cup powdered sugar

2 tsp pure vanilla

top with fresh berries and enjoy!

ps. I have made angel food cake several times before and it's always turned out great. This was the first time I've made it since we've lived here--at higher elevation and it fell. It tasted the same--it was just very small and very dense. Has anyone made angel food cake at a higher altitude? 

How did you make it work?

that's my girl.

happy day to my six year old!

angel food cake with with chocolate whipped cream and raspberries

angel food cake with whipped cream and strawberries

eight.

he requested blueberry pancakes.

Eight. Years. Old.

I am such a lucky mama to have spent eight years with this little guy.

He was born with lashes that reached out to his nose.

In his first few months we'd walk and walk and walk around our little neighborhood.

Well.....I walked, and pushed. And he loved it.

Big blue eyes and chubby cheeks. 

Happy and content. Always.

Taught me how to mother. How to truly love.

Barely two years old and the best big brother for our favorite little girl.

Sidekicks. Partners in crime.

He grew.

He loved to learn.

Letters. Numbers.

THE most random facts you have ever known.

He loves them.

Loves school.

So much knowledge hiding in that moppy hair.

He laughs. Teases. Jokes around with us.

He makes friends with everyone, just like dad.

Tiny freckles dot his nose and cheeks....just like dad. 

He has the ability to over think EVERYTHING.....that comes from me. 

His chicken legs and future unibrow come from me too.....you are welcome, son.

A little man. And still, my baby boy.

Love him so.

He got to plan the entire day--start to finish!

He wanted to go exploring somewhere new......so we did!

He requested burgers at the Drug Store (can't argue with that!) with friends.

Followed by cake.....

He actually requested EIGHT layers (I laughed, but then was flattered that my kids think so highly of me), and I told him four was the best I could do.

(Hey--it's eight counting the whipped cream and frosting.....)

And I totally cheated and skipped out on a picture since I knew I already had one (I made this cake a couple summers ago.....)

Chocolate Layer Cake with Whipped Vanilla Cream, 

Raspberries, and Chocolate Buttercream

Chocolate Cake

4 ounces semisweet chocolate

3/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder

3/4 cup boiling water

6 TBS butter, melted

1 1/2 cups sugar

2 large eggs

1 cup buttermilk

1tsp vanilla

1 1/4 cups cake flour

1 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon baking powder

1/2 teaspoon salt

Preheat oven to 350°F.

Line bottom of two 8" pans with a round of parchment paper. Butter paper, and sides of pan.

(I don't have 4 pans, so I did two 8" pans, twice for my four layers)

Finely chop chocolate and in a bowl combine with boiling water and cocoa powder. Let mixture stand, stirring occasionally, until chocolate is melted and mixture is smooth.

In a bowl add flour, baking soda, baking powder, and salt. In another large bowl with an electric mixer beat butter and sugar until combined. Add eggs (adding one at a time) until thickened slightly and light colored (about 3 minutes). Slowly add buttermilk, vanilla, and melted chocolate mixture, beating until combined well. Add flour mixture and beat on medium speed until just combined.

Spoon batter into pans, and bake two at a time until a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean, 12-15 minutes. 

Repeat with two more cakes.

(batter will divide into about 1 1/2c for each of four pans)

Cool cakes completely before frosting.

Whipped Vanilla Cream

2 cups whipping cream

1/2 cup powdered sugar

1 tsp pure vanilla extract

Whip cream on high speed for a few minutes until soft peaks start to form. Add powder sugar and vanilla and whip a little bit longer until you have reached a light and fluffy, whip cream consistency.

Chocolate Buttercream

8 TBS butter

1/2+  cup cocoa powder (depending on how cocoa-y you like it)

2 cups powdered sugar

A few TBS milk

Beat butter, cocoa, and powdered sugar, and add milk a little at a time until you reach a consistency you like.

Spread first layer of cake with whipped cream, and add a few small handfuls of fresh raspberries over the whipped cream. Repeat with remaining layers. Spread the chocolate buttercream on the top layer and top with more fresh raspberries.

Take a picture, because that is one big cake you just made.

enjoy!

happy day to my boy!

here we go

a happy happy moment riding on a bike path through Zion National Park with my kiddos....I know I look a little crazy....but I was pretty excited to be in Zion.

 

Here I sit.

I write this with only a few hours left in my twenties.

My hair is pulled up, I'm sporting one of Robby's Ts (oh, and his socks), and I feel the green face mask starting to dry on my cheeks.

Glamorous. 

I'm drinking fresh made juice--a muddy combination of spinach, carrots, apple, and lemon. 

It's extra tart, and I like it.

And just in case you think I'm so healthy sitting here at night with my green juice, it's only because I ate half a salty dark chocolate bar my grandma sent me......so I'm trying to balance it out....you know?

I'm looking at my (very lady-like....cough..) legs, still bruised from rock climbing over the weekend.

I hear giggles from the other room of kids who are making birthday cards 

(and think I have no idea what they are up to).

I am excited.

For 30.

It's here (finally!)

I've had so many people ask if I was dreading it......NO! 

I welcome it.

Twenty-nine was rough. 

We had some great moments--yes we did. 

We visited some incredible places and saw God's beauty all over this wild West. 

We were blessed and blessed and blessed.

But as I've found in my wise old age (ha), there are good years and there are bad, and twenty-nine kind of piled up on me--I earned a few wrinkles last year, fair and square.

So I say bring on 30! Let's go! 

I can feel that things are going to happen this year. Wonderful things. A few years ago had you asked me where I'd be at 30, I'd have told you 4 kids (I was dead set), and feeling a whole lot more settled than we are now.

I have learned that life doesn't always go as planned (bummer!).....but I'm starting this year knowing who I am and what makes me tick.....and that right there is good enough.

I will continue to surround myself with worthwhile things and fantastic people, and work on sifting out poor influences and time wasters. 

Only good things for this 30 year old. 

whoa. that sounds old.

ketchup

How are you? We haven't been talking so much lately.....have we? 

This is a power packed post......so much to catch up on.

Starting with:

I am now married to an MBA graduate. IT'S TRUE!!! He did it! We did it!

 

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This weekend was graduation and it was an amazing feeling knowing that we made it through this crazy time in our lives. He still has three weeks of school left (uuuhhh....kind of a buzz kill, right?) but I am almost done with this whole single-mother thing.....yippee!!!

We even got to go on a graduation weekend date.....bonus!

 

and here is my haggard family after a 17 hour long ceremony.

 

I have a five year old. FIVE!!! How do babies grow up and turn five? It should be illegal.

Her cake was chocolate cake layered with whip cream, chocolate buttercream, and strawberries. 

(basically this cake)

(last year's ruffly cake here)

I ran the Timpanogos Trail Half last weekend (which actually clocked in for me at 13.7 miles)  

I ran it last year, and apparently I forgot how insanely steep sections of that trail are.....like, straight up. OH. THE. BURN. calves. quads. buns. all on fire. this race pooped me out, but it was a great run. The UP was exhausting, but I pushed and pushed and pushed and felt strong all the way dooooowwwwn the giant mountain. 

My kids chased me through the finish line and then we all collapsed.

I wore the boy's camelbak, and while it was't 100% ideal for me (I would like wider straps, a bottom strap, and pockets on the straps).....it actually worked out ok. 

I ended up getting 4th place for women (only 39 women in the race), and while the course was beautiful....to be completely honest, I left wanting a little more. Everyone in this race was so quiet. No one really talked during the race, or even after. Everyone really kept to themselves, which was so different than last month's race in Moab, where I felt like we were all a team. So my advice to you if you are out on the trails--say hello! Tell someone they are doing an awesome job. 

You are all in it together, so why not make a party out of it?

after:

 

Speaking of running, my Saturday (early early) morning run looked like this:

 

AMAZING! We climbed up 4000ft. 

as much as I love to sleep in, early early morning runs are the best because:

-sunrise

-not so many mountain bikes to run you over

-cool temps

-the rattlesnakes are still sleeping, so when you come within an inch stepping on them, (aaaAAAAaAAhHHhhhhHHh!!!!!!!) they are too lazy to sink their fangs into your chicken leg.

annnnd last, and totally least:

My wisdom teeth are coming out Thursday. 

all of them.

oh. man. 

Please tell me I will live. 

I am so bummed out because I am missing out on opening day at the farmers market this weekend.....will you go for me?

I think that's it.....well.....some if it anyway....I just found out it's already June....what?!

What have YOU been up to?

dear may

note: this is the most random assortment of photos....whoops

dear.........may?!! What?? Where did April go?

Dear May,

hello. Nice to see you again. You bring so many wonderful things.

(hopefully) something smallish from the garden.

spring in the mountains....more open trails!

maybe camping....please?

closer and closer to summer each day. 

yay, may.

Dear April,

WHAT HAPPENED? Where did the time go? I really don't remember. I'm sorry.

There was the boy's birthday, easter, moab.....you just passed too quickly.

Dear Our Giant Tree,

the last few weeks have been so fun watching you change.

bare. blossoms. full green leaves. thank you for your shade.

Dear Appendix (or as my girl calls it, "independex")

what was that all about? Seriously you are the WORST. I will not miss you.

Dear Tomatoes,

I should be able to get you in the ground this month.....hooray!! I look forward to hanging out.

Dear Trail Running (Addiction?),

you are all I think about! Must. have. more. trails.

Running this and this (please read the description of that last one.....thrilling!)

Who wants to join me?

Dear Camping,

when will you happen? I need some fresh mountainy air.......right now.

Dear S'mores,

I'll see you soon too (see above)

Dear Grilled Asparagus,

you are my favorite right now.

Dear Shadow Puppets,

you really are a good time for all.

even better when the animals "attack the world"

Dear 7 year old,

Every year I ask the same thing.....how?

I love you.

Your shaggy hair. Missing teeth. Curious mind.

Dear Attempt at a Lego Cake,

fail.

frosting marshmallows is maybe the most impossible thing,

ever.

But he loved it.....so oh well I guess.

Dear Charly,

you are THREE now!!

and you are actually turning out to be quite the dog.....

....until someone comes over and you tackle them and lick them to death.

Dear Future Guests,

watch out for our dog,

she is still crazy.

Dear Chocolate Pudding,

you really know how to cheer a girl up.

Chocolate and Coconut Pudding

serves 4

1/2 cup sugar 

2 TBS unsweetened cocoa powder 

2 TBS cornstarch 

1/8 tsp salt 

1 1/3 cups milk

2/3 cup coconut milk (small can is 2/3 cup. I'm pretty sure if you swapped out ALL the milk for coconut milk, it would be awesome, but I just had a small can.)

 2 egg yolks (slightly beaten) 

2 oz dark chocolate, finely chopped 

1/2 tsp pure vanilla extract 

Mix sugar, cocoa, cornstarch, and salt in a saucepan. Slowly mix in milk and coconut milk. Cook over medium heat (continue stirring), until mixture comes to boil. Boil for one minute (still stirring) Slowly stir half the mixture into the egg yolks, and then back into the saucepan on the stove. Boil for one minute. Remove from heat and add in chopped chocolate and vanilla extract. Pour into bowls and  cover (unless you are one of those people who like the "skin", cough, mom) and put pudding in the refrigerator for at least one hour. 

Top with toasted coconut and enjoy!

Dear YOU, 

what have you been up to? 

sincerely yours/love/until next time

me.

speaking of.....

me and my tower of ruby snap

Wow!
Thanks everyone for the birthday wishes this week!
I loved reading them all.....thank you!

I had a great day with my little family and we are all still full of our favorite pizza and cookies.

Speaking of full, we have been eating a lot of steel cut oats (I was never that in to them because they took so long to cook, and our mornings are crazy......and then I realized oh wait, I can cook them ahead of time and actually SAVE time in the morning......perfect!) Last time I toasted them in a little bit of coconut oil before cooking them, and then after they are cooked, topped them with almond milk, almonds, flax, unsweetened coconut, and bananas and WOW. New favorite for breakfast, pre-run, or post-yoga!
How to you eat your oats?

Speaking of almond milk, I am going to be making some soon, thanks to tips from Jen who is an expert. I will post about it and let you know how it goes!

Speaking of blog posts, blogging in the winter is hard! We have been eating some super yummy things, but when we are eating it.....it's dark! No photos to be taken. So let me paint you a picture of our dinner a few nights back....
whole wheat spaghetti tossed with:
-saute'd garlic (lots!), sun-dried tomatoes, artichoke hearts, capers, spinach
lemon juice, lemon zest, olive oil and s&p
all topped with a yummy piece of salmon....mmmm
close your eyes, picture it beautiful, and make it!

and still speaking of blog posts, I LOVED all the feedback on Monday's brussels sprouts post!! Seriously go read the comments--there are enough ideas to have brussels sprouts every day for a month.

Speaking of comments, and back to my birthday post.....I had no idea so many of you girls were also crazy and got married at 19.....I love it! We should start a club.

Speaking of crazy.....how 'bout this weather? Seriously I know "The Weather" is the number one small talk topic, but I actually love talking about the weather. I check the weather several times a day, in several different locations, (nerd), and love seeing what's going on. Anyway, although it "snowed" a teeny tiny bit last week, we are still feeling like it's spring here! It's just crazy. Sunshine, sunshine and more sunshine. I can't wait to get out in it tomorrow.

Speaking of spring, I am getting so ancy for real spring.....aren't you? Last year was the first time I planted any cold weather veggies (radishes, carrots, lettuce), and this year I can't wait to do more. Just have to wait until March......what do you plant in the spring?

Speaking of lettuce, my lettuce took off last year! We had fresh salads (yes plural) every single day. I HATE having to buy lettuce in the stores now knowing how much we had. This year I'm going to try planting it like THIS. Space saving AND no weeding between rows....perfect.

Speaking of the fact that I just linked you to my Pinterest, are you on there? I love how organized it makes me feel, and I have been trying so many new recipes because if it.

Speaking of linking you more places, check out the new sponsors that will be coming in over the next few days (right side bar). I still have a few spots left....email me!

What are your plans for this weekend?
Have a happy one!

really super random notes for today:

-I get so many emails, and I LOVE them, but I don't always have time to respond (although I try!) I'm working on an FAQ page for common questions that come up, if you have something you'd like to be included, let me know!

-Did you know I'm on facebook? It's true.

-I MUST go to Yosemite. soon. watch THIS and you will want to go too.

two niner

disclaimer: I started this as a simple quick post. and then it just kept going. and going and going.
So I wrote it out for ME.....but you can read it too, if you have too much time on your hands, a snack to enjoy, and something to keep you hydrated.


Short version: today is my birthday.  I like being outside. 29 is going to be awesome.


me. a few weeks back when charly and I were headed up up up the mountain to escape the inversion.

and she has officially entered her 30th year.

she being me.

29 years old.

whoa.

how. 

what?!

I am actually, really, the more I think about it........EXCITED! 

This is going to be a good year....I know it.

28 was a turning point for me.

But first, let's go back.

waaaaaaay back.

19. 

I was married. 

NINETEEN! 

The hardest part about being so young (NINETEEN!!!) when you get married, is that you are most definitely, for sure, in no way, grown up yet. 

Oh, you THINK you are.....but you are not. 

I was not. 

So while trying to adjust to newly wedded bliss and modern housewifery, full time school and work......you are still trying to grow up. 

That's aLOT going on at once.

Oh, and remember how you are 19?

You start to maybe, kinda, sorta, get a grasp on your early 20s, and then BAM!! 

At 22 you have a beautiful, perfect, long-lashed baby boy. 

New motherhood is a challenge at any age, but 22! 

You are still working on YOU! 

Early and mid-twenties flash by in a frenzy of diapers and wipes and tickling of toes...

....because now a lovely little curly headed girl has joined the family.

You will one day wake up and realize that you never quite finished that whole "growing up" thing--you were too busy birthing babies and helping them take their own first steps.

What do you like? What makes you, you?

Being a mother is your absolute favorite thing in the entire world. 

In the UNIVERSE! 

It is the bestest of the best.

But it does not define you.

You start to try things out. 

Test the waters. 

What are the other mothers doing?

You try your hand at scrapbooking. HA! that didn't last long.

You dabble in this and that, motherly hobbies that fizzle out in days. 

You are lost. 

You care too much about what others think,
and don't think enough for yourself. 

And then one day, it clicks.
Without searching or asking or watching what the others are doing.

You decide to take your usual run to a trail.
You leap over.
Dodge under.
Your feet are quick.
You fall.
Get back up.
THIS is what you've been missing.
Outside. 
Simple as that.
Nothing you could have found in Super Mom Magazine,
and nothing Oprah told you to do.

Outside.

Something you grew up with,
but for some reason,
these last few years you forgot.
Forgot how wonderful it is to just be out.

And from there on out, you are good to go.
It's you! You're back!
You re-prioritize.
You get your family outside more.
Make sure you all get good and dirty.
Often.
You simply came back to what you liked growing up.
Nothing new, or trendy.....it was just YOU.

I am excited for what this new year will bring for me.
What will 29 have in store?
Hands in the dirt.
Climbs up mountains.
Camping under stars.
Blisters on our feet, scuffs on our knees.
Lakes. Rivers. Streams.
Bugs and Birds.
Eating food we planted and grew.
Teaching my Littles about all these things, and how important they are to me.

And most importantly, continuing to sift out those unimportant things in my life, and focus on all of the (MANY!) little things I love, and that make me, me.

***

WOW. Did we get just a little cheesy? Please refer to last week's post on actual cheese if you feel like you are in the mood, thanks to this post.

Where did all this come from? I think maybe my parents found me in the woods.

Last year of my 20s....let's go!

dear four year old,

look at her!

what? how!? why? WHEN??!

I remember four years ago, eating lime snow cones in the delivery room waiting for you to come. Daddy and I were watching Notting Hill, and I was trying so hard to focus on contractions, but instead I was laughing my head off at Hugh Grant.

To this day I am always laughing when you are around. 

You are the goofiest, sweetest girl....and you know it!

I love that all you wanted for your birthday was a fishing pole, but that you also will only wear the twirliest of dresses and sparkliest of shoes.

I love that you are usually wearing several band-aids and have scuffed up knees, but that you also love to  comb and comb and comb your hair, waiting for it to grow as long as Rapunzels.

I love that you are my baby. Sometimes I scoop you up in my arms and rock you back and forth....

....and then  you yell, "MOO-OOM!!! I am NOT a baby! 

Why do you always think I am a baby you silly girl!"

But moms are very smart, and usually right, and so I should tell you....you ARE my baby, no matter how big you get.

Let's try not to get big so fast....

Happy Birthday baby girl!!

love,

mommy.

annnd......all she wanted for her birthday cake was chocolate cake with pink frosting...

...so here you have it!

Chocolate Cake with Strawberry Buttercream

2 ounces semisweet chocolate

3/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder

3/4 cup boiling water

6 TBS butter, melted

1 1/2 cups sugar

2 large eggs

1 cup milk

1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon baking powder

1/2 teaspoon salt

Preheat oven to 350°F.

Line bottom of two 8" cake pans with round of parchment paper, butter paper, and sides of pan.

Finely chop chocolate and in a bowl combine with hot water and cocoa powder. Let mixture stand, stirring occasionally, until chocolate is melted and mixture is smooth.

In a bowl add flour, baking soda, baking powder, and salt. In another large bowl with an electric mixer beat butter and sugar until combined. Add eggs (adding one at a time) until thickened slightly and light colored (about 3 minutes). Slowly add milk, and melted chocolate mixture, beating until combined well. Add flour mixture and beat on medium speed until just combined.

Pour batter into pan, and bake in middle of oven until a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean, 25-30 minutes.

Cool cake completely before frosting.

Strawberry Buttercream

3/4 cup butter

1/2 cup strawberry puree (a large handful of strawberries thrown in the food processor)

1 tsp pure vanilla

5-6 cups powder sugar (depending on how thick you want your frosting. I needed it a little bit thicker so the ruffles would hold up. Ruffle tutorial here.

cream together butter, puree, and vanilla. Add powdered sugar a little at a time until you reach the consistency you like.

Chocolate Buttercream (for middle layer)

1/4 cup butter

1/4 cup cocoa powder

1 cup powder sugar 

3-4 TBS milk

Cream together butter, cocoa, powdered sugar. Add milk a little at a time. 

enjoy!

jedi training party

So. 

You have a six year old (you are old).

He loves Star Wars. 

LOVES Star Wars. 

So of course, he wants a Star Wars birthday party with all his friends. 

What do you do?

You let him plan it!!

This party ended up being really easy to do--easy AND inexpensive--my favorite things. 

Ask your little guy for ideas, and he'll come up with some crazy stuff. Together you can use your imaginations and come up with a simple fun plan.

What you need:

1) a second location. Since our first location was the park, and it was SNOWING!! 

I was SOOOOO thankful we could use our church gym last minute.

2) Rowdy children

3) lightsabers! pool noodles cut in half (I used black and sliver tape on the ends for a "handle", but you don't have to). This way they can beat each other silly and no one will get hurt.

4)A Jedi training course. Balloons, streamers, tables, chairs, slides, swings--any kind of obstacle you can think up!

5) Star Wars Music.....because that makes it official.

note: no need for extra decorations or anything fancy..... boys don't care! don't give yourself the extra work.

After everyone had completed the course, we all lined up for a Darth Vader pinata (found on Amazon).

Star Wars Cupcakes. 

Easiest thing I've ever done (and maybe the ugliest/most disturbing), but I have never seen kids so excited. 

The boy even liked them more than last years R2D2 cake.

I printed out Star Wars character heads onto cardstock, cut them out (creepy I know) and glued them to toothpicks (even creepier.) Did a quick frosting job on the cupcakes, stuck them in and VWALLA! Instant hit. 

Lesson learned: ALWAYS HAVE A CAKE MIX ON HAND. Why oh why did I waste my time making homemade cupcakes for little boys who lick the (mint buttercream) frosting off so they can hurry and go play??? crazy.

Lesson #2 learned: Let dad get in on the action. This was never part of "The Plan" that they boy and I had come up with....he had no idea, and was so surprised!

 Robby called me the day before the party and told me he found a costume to rent... 

He came running into the gym after cake, presents, and lots of lightsaber battles and it was terrifying! I thought he looked so scary--but the boys didn't even think twice. 

They all jumped right up and chased him around the gym.

NOTE: If Darth Vader chooses to make an appearance at your party, may I suggest you have him come let's say, five or so minutes before the party ends. Darth Vader can lay down and pretend to die, but the newly trained Jedi will not care--they will continue to beat him. 

and beat him. 

and beat him. 

He can try to run away, but these are little boys, who never tire. 

Make sure Darth Vader knows what he is getting himself in to.

happy birthday boy.

the end.

good morning, six year old

I remember standing in the living room of a teeny tiny yellow house.

It had been raining. 

It was dark. 

And quiet.

It was that time of day that was no longer night, but not yet morning. 

The world slept. 

I held on to your dad tightly, rocking back and forth, sure that I would die any minute. 

Watching the clock, timing contractions, wondering when to go to the hospital. 

Wishing each minute would pass faster, instead of 

sooooo....

....oooo...................

......slowly.

If only time could speed up, and I could hurry you out into the world. 

Finally, you came.

And here you are, this morning.

Six. 

Six years old. 

Six years later. 

We did it.

I love you.