Monday, November 21, 2011

the unmentioned

sleeping. in her hat.
sleep copy
ok. let's get down to it. 

judging by the above image, you may be thinking today's thankful post is going to be something like
I am thankful for my adorably adorable children.
I am thankful that my adorably adorable children are such good sleepers. 
I am thankful blabiby blabidy blah, 
sentimental blah.

I AM thankful for my adorably adorable children, but my last few thankful posts have been leaning more towards the sappy side, don't you think? 
As much as I love thinking of all we have to be thankful for (and I am genuinely thankful), sometimes I end my posts with cheese dripping off my screen--I hope you are reading them with a side of crackers--I always do.

So today we are going to talk about things that we should all be thankful for, but in happy sappy blogland no one wants to talk about them.

The Unmentioned.  

I am going to go where maybe, just maybe, 
no blogger has gone before. 

This is deep stuff. 


I am thankful for toilets. 
Uh, yeah I am. 
And you are too. 
Sparkling white toilets in clean bathrooms with doors that close, with a roll of toilet paper (maybe on the holder the wrong way depending on who replaced it) within reach.
I have ran enough races, and used enough porta-potties to know how thankful I am for real, working toilets. 
I have camped enough in the great outdoors (and while it is beautiful), I would much prefer a bathroom to a bush. 

I am thankful for my toenails. 
They are ugly and smashed and crooked from years of running. But this summer I had a podiatrist suggest that I have them removed (REMOVED!!!!), so I wouldn't have to worry about them, being a runner and all. WHAT?! No thank you. But ever since I have looked at them (and their lack of pedicure) and just been thankful that no matter how ugly they may be, at least they are there. 

As long as we are talking ugly deformed things, 
I am thankful for my feet. 
My right foot is flat and hobbit like, oh, probably because there is an extra bone in it. (Please don't stop being my friend because I am sharing all my deformities with you). This spring after a race I ran, I was having some major issues with that extra bone in my foot. It kept me from running most of the summer, and it really made me realize how much I love to run....NEED to run. After it healed up I vowed to take care of my feet (with the exception of removing my toenails) so I wouldn't injure myself again. 

I am thankful for push-up bras. 
Self explanatory. 

I am thankful for whoever the man (or lady) is that invented chips and salsa. Bless them. 

I am thankful for the NBA lockout, 
and how it is blessing my marriage with precious extra hours of our lives together. Bless those greedy spoiled men who won't play until they get more money. Bless them, every one. 

I am thankful for the times my 4-year old gets words confused and instead of calling the mannequins we saw in the mall "mannequins", she was calling them "cannibals". 
I am thankful I had the sense not to correct it, because it was HILARIOUS. 
Cannibals everywhere!

I am thankful for wonderful and clever television that makes us laugh and laugh and laugh and escape the world.
Thank you Community, Parks and Rec, Modern Family and Up all Night for that. 

I am thankful for television remotes, because who wants to get up to change the channel. How did they survive back in olden days? 

(you know, the 80s)

Also, thank you Jimmy Fallon. Can we be friends?

I am thankful for two adorably adorable children that are old enough and able to help out. I am thankful I can send them outside when it's raining to get the dog. I am thankful they will so willingly unload and sort the Costco purchases. 
See, you thought I was going to get sappy about my kids there, huh? 
No, I am just thankful for child labor. 

Speaking of Costco, 
oh dear sweet Costco, I love you.
Who knew shopping for things 20 lbs at a time could be so much fun?!
I am NOT thankful for the people who will actually shove you out of the way to get to a sample of a bean burrito. 
The Costco Sample Eaters are crazy! 
( I figured since this is a non-sappy post, I could include something I am not thankful for ) 

I am thankful for mashed potatoes. 

I am thankful for those few friends on facebook that, really, you only keep un-hidden because their daily hourly play by play updates are just too perfectly detailed. 
9:05"I've got a case of the Mondays!" 
9:06"Gearing up to clean the bathroom! I hate cleaning the bathroom" 
9:07"What's your favorite music to listen to while cleaning the bathroom?" 
9:08 "MONDAY! OYE!" 
9:19 (you were starting to get worried)
"Bathroom cleaned! Take that!" 
9:19:34 "Watch out world!"
( I am serious, I have people like this in my life, you know you do too)
Regardless, it always makes me smile.

I am thankful for cold days where I can use "oh, it's cold today, I probably won't shave my legs because I need the extra layer of warmth" as an excuse for "I just really don't want to shave my legs today."

Although I AM thankful for razors, because if I never shaved my beastly legs, then you really probably wouldn't be my friend.  

I am thankful for the shameless self promotion that having my own blog allows me. 
Did you know I'm photographing a cookbook for the always amazing Whitney Ingram? 
Did you know she has a blog
Did you know, I would be tickled if you would follow them? 
Only good can come of it, I assure you.
As long as we are self promoting here, did you know that I too have a facebook page? 

So as we wrap this up, let's go back to the photo above. 
Adorable sleeping babe? Yes. 
But what I'm really thankful for is that giant furry hat she loves so much. 
It NEVER comes off. 
Which means I don't have to do her hair. 
(sidenote: I have no idea how to do little girls' hair. 
she hates having her hair done. 
we struggle in this department of mother/daughtering. 

I could go on and on......this is fun. 
But I will stop here. 

I am thankful you are still here with me, 
and thankful that I know you will share your own  "unmentioned" things to be thankful for. 

let's hear it.


Anna Scandinavian Cottage said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sara said...

So fun to read:)...btw; I`m in the club of the ugly toenails, too....I`ve had surgery on my toe 4 times, so it is weird and ugly....

I am thankful for:

*tampons (what did women do before they were invented??)
*Weirdly looking wool-socks that keep my feet warm
*doors (because you can`t see through them, obviously)
*twinkle lights
*drawers (because they look neat, even though they have a mess inside them)

Love, Sara

Li + Belle said...

This is a great, funny and endearing post. I like him from the first row to the last.:)

Rachel said...

This is one of the funniest posts I've ever read! I might have to think of some unmentioned in time for the family gathering this week to keep everyone on their feet! We never think about those things, but with this outlook, there's so much to be thankful for!

melissa said...

i just saw a clip of jimmy fallon's celebrity whispers. such a funny guy.

ps i have often looked at my gorgeous sleeping babe in his carseat when i have a carload of groceries and thought: you are absolutely no help to me, child. and then sometimes i think, but at least you're a boy so i don't have to attempt to do your hair. this is truth.

Unknown said...

I too, am super thankful for toilets. Clean toilets. You can't put a price on 'em!

Sabrina said...

Amen to the NBA lockout. I'd be happy if they never came back.
I'm thankful for microwaves, fridges, ice, epidurals, skiing, washer/dryer, Nutella, Modern Family, Amazing Race and my toothbrush.

summer said...

ohhh yes. this post is great!! ok, i would love to play. i am thankful for..
blinds that allow me to hideout in my house. (moms of newborns, you get it, right?)
moments when i am fully clothed. (aka not nursing)
hats that hide my unwashed hair.
that the ups man stopped walking in our side door uninvited.
not having a home phone, so i don't have to answer it.
tons of playing time on words with friends, thanks to nursing.

Mommy Sauri~ said...

I too am thankful for my little spot on the web where I can talk about myself and my family.

I'd be super thankful if others would start to follow my blog and make comments. I want to know what you think and I want to make it better.

And I'm thankful for you Sheena. It's because of you that I have a new advent calendar for my kids that they are going to love and that mommy had a fun time making! I only need 4 more ideas to fill my envelopes

Meg said...

I'm thankful for headbands because they make it look like I styled my giant, messy hair to be giant and messy on purpose.

Emily said...

I read a facebook status once that said "What if you woke up tomorrow with only the things you thanked God for today?" The first thing I thought of was how glad I am that my ceilings are high enough that I can stand up straight....

Ally said...

can i get an amen?! too funny. too funny. you got me all up in stitches!

Claire said...

I've been sitting here trying to think of some worthy "unmentionables" to share, but I kept pushing ideas out of my head saying they were too embarrassing. But what the heck?

I am thankful for the candle burning in my kitchen, hiding the smell of the yucky dishes from Sunday dinner that are still in the sink (or on the counter...or the stove).
I am thankful for maternity tights and how they make my early pregnancy chub look more like a beautiful pregnant belly.
I am thankful for those baby oranges that come around ever year around this time. I eat at least six every day.

Kimmie said...

I love how real you are Sheena!!

Funny thing about no's been one hectic week, haven't shaved the armpits, legs, or "unmentionables" all week and my hubby and kids want to go soak at our local hot springs to warm up in this COLD weather and so we loaded the car, drove to the location, paid, got dressed and I realized as I was putting on my bathing suit that everyone there swimming would be able to tell I hadn't shaved in a week or two, OR, maybe they thought I was turning into a "Hippie", but my kids and hubby and I all got a chuckle everytime they got looking at my armpits, or legs.

Gotta love having a family that can laugh with you under any circumstances...I'm truly blessed in that area.

Gotta love these silly moments that make us LAUGH and make us realize what's really important in life...time spent together!!

Even though the morning after was hectic and shaving meant I wouldn't have time to do my hair, I decided shaving was more important.

Hope your Thanksgiving week is wonderful...I am SO glad I have found your blog, it's a blessing in my life and I LOVE IT!!

Ashley said...

I love this list. Also, judging from the shows you watch I think we should be friends, ugly toe nails and all.

Anonymous said...

Once when I was in 10th grade, the teacher asked us what ONE thing we would bring to a deserted island for the rest of our life. My friend and I both looked at each other and simultaneously said


Yep. I echo that sentiment now. I'm grateful for that unmentionable, ESPECIALLY this weekend for reasons and unfortunate situations I will spare you.

Rachel said...

Awesome! I'm thankful for mouse traps- my husband doesn't bust his hump at work for those disease ridden creatures to get a free ride!

Anonymous said...

Love the thankful list! I do mine on Mondays to counteract the Monday morning blues on :)

birdhouse productions said...

favorite. thankful post. ever. i literally LOL'ed. so wish we could be friends!

Unknown said...

hahaha i love all of this. probably my favorite thankful post.

today im thankful for:)
nursing pads,
the way new babies smell,
my two year old thats been potty trained because we are poor students spending a cagillion dollars on newborn diapers,
nap time,
my dish washer,
and toothpaste.

all so random but very important.

Tara said...

You had me at "I am thankful for my toenails."

RoxyRo said...

I am thankful for the internet...gets people close.Gives the chance to know things you wouldn't know otherwize.